Hosea

"Hosea 1:2 When the LORD first spoke to Hosea, He said this to him:
Go and marry a promiscuous wife
and [have] children of promiscuity,
for the whole land has been promiscuous
by abandoning the LORD.
3 So he went and married Gomer daughter of Diblaim..."

I admit that I 'pretend' to be an avid reader of serious books. If its anything written by Lewis Grizzard, I'm up for it. Shakespear? Not really. Although I do make it a point to read Dickens' "A Christmas Carol" every December. Its a tradition that I've kept for 5 years now.

Anyway, I've had several people over the past year suggest that I read "Redeeming Love" by Francine Rivers. I've had a copy sitting in the apartment for probably a year before going on a beach trip where Rochelle was reading it. 4 of the 6 girls there had read it and highly suggested I read it too. Rochelle actually set her copy on my bed and told me to read it. I obeyed. The first night I had it I stayed up until almost 4 a.m. reading.

I won't ruin the book if you haven't read it, but it is pretty much the book of Hosea from the Bible set in the 1840/1850's in the American west. As I read it I so upset with Angel (Gomer for those who have read Hosea)! I spent 3/4th of the book being annoyed by this girl! Why couldn't she get it together? Its SO OBVIOUS that Michael (Hosea) loves her like crazy! He's kind, patient, loving, and gentle and strong all at the same time. At first she just runs from Him and the life he is offering her. Then she's convinced she doesn't deserve what he is offering and that he deserves something better than her, and leaves again.

I know you may know this in your head-my head, but really think about it. That is absolutely in every capacity us! I know the verses say "...just as" or "for the whole land has abandoned the Lord", but its so much easier to look at someone else and say "Look at what an idiot she's being! I can't believe she's turning her back on the best thing that has ever happened to her!" But thats us---thats me. God loves us, more than anyone ever could. He pursues us. He forgives us. He takes us back hundreds of thousands of times.

And we run. For several different reasons really. Anger, fear of God hurting us, not feeling worthy, not liking what He's saying, etc. Its totally ridiculous for us to run, but we do it anyway.

I've recently fallen back in love with David Crowder Band. And I've fallen even more in love with the song "How He Loves". This is one of the line that gets me - "He is jealous for me/loves like a hurricane and I am a tree/bending beneath the weight of his wind and mercy". He really is jealous for us.

Here's another verse from Hosea that shows this:
Hosea 2:13 And I will punish her for the days of the Baals
when she burned incense to them,
put on her rings and jewelry,
and went after her lovers,
but forgot Me.
[This is] the LORD's declaration

"...but forgot Me." That's not just a jealous statement, its a sad one too. He loves us so much. He wants to be near us. To talk to us. To talk to me. If only I could forget my childish fears of God striking me down for one wrong move and really take to heart how gracious and just He is. Or if only I could remember that there is NOTHING we can do to separate us from His love. I want to know God more. I want to know His character more and have that love and grace with those around me.

Joy introduced me to Addison Road, and I think they might have said it best "There's a better version of me That I can't quite see But things are gonna change..."

...Things are changing already...